My retirement motto to date should be, "With more time comes more procrastination." Since July 1, with a few exceptions, I have had the luxury of being the master of my schedule. While I still have commitments, the when and how I fulfill those commitments is up to me. I can mow early morning or late afternoon. The few tasks I have for student teacher supervision can be done over coffee or sans libation. While I have managed to complete the necessary tasks in a timely manner, time alone with God has been more of a struggle to fit in than at any time I can remember.
I envisioned my retirement days being filled with a couple of side jobs, many volunteer hours, and long, deep journeys into God's word accompanied with insightful, almost Solomon-like additions to this blog. Yeah, right!
This lack of God time is not the result of not having enough time, resources, or even desire. At the end of the day, it is a spiritual battle that I am losing.
In Ephesians 6:12, Paul writes, " For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places." (Eph. 6:12 ESV) This is most certainly the case in regards to my spiritual disciplines and use of time since retirement. And I have become painfully aware that I am woefully ill-equipped to fight this battle as the Lone Ranger.
Luckily Paul also realized that we are not able to stand up to this satanic attack alone. In the next 6 verses, he outlined the holy armor that allows us to be victorious.
Ephesians 6:13-19 is the only solution to where I currently find my spiritual walk. It will take the belt of truth, the breastplate of righteousness, the shield of faith, the helmet of salvation, the sword of the Spirit, and consistent prayer to overcome the spiritual doldrums in which I find myself. It may not be easy or quick, but the payoff will be worth any struggle.
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