Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Feb. 1- Turmoil

Don't know what it going on right now.  Weird place spiritually.  Feeling like want to turn my back on church, Bible reading, prayer, etc.  Not planning on doing so, but quite a bit of dissatisfaction right now.

Keep thinking that there should be more of an emotional connection to Bible study, quiet time and pray sessions.

Desolate.  Arid.
  

Have found myself looking to purchase a different vehicle these past several weeks.  Just now hit me that this was an attempt to fill this void.

God just doesn't feel personal right now.  Is that heresy?  I know He has not moved away from me, but I have moved away from Him.

I covet (but covet in the desirous way, not the "shalt not" way) your prayers.  I feel foolish for requesting a chunk of your prayer time.  I know health issues, jobs for loved ones and salvation issues are much more urgent.

Epiphany-  Perhaps my dilemma is caused by a focus on me.  Just look at how many personal pronouns have been used in today's blog.  Much too much focus on DLM.

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